hotness would be my gurlll Tayler Sylvain
(instagram @taylersylvain)

photo by ricky... insta @king1ward 

dreaming of the day…

Singing softly to him

   As he kisses my nose

Write our love in the night sky

Diamonds and coffee

Reading and writing

While he plays me morning

Melodies I sip my tea

And just cry

The silent snow falls outside

I could waste away my 

days chewing and chewing

But what is there in it for me?

When I can’t think straight,

And the walls bleed blue

I can’t imagine the room

Without light- but lately

Nothing can make the butterfly

Fly or the baby cry

for you ( you know who you are )

And even if we just have this for a moment

The taste so delicate, sits on the back of my tongue

I want to taste it again, the sins 

– you make my heart melt

   The overwhelming feeling of warmth

And life just pours out of our souls

The time together we hold, So close to our hearts

A lifetime could be measured in years or tears

Depending on how you look at it.

We have together, such a rare

Beautiful thing, why let anyone else in?

Precious as a stone, our love could make

One hundred gardens grow.

All I know is you give light to the dark

And you show affection towards my wilting

       Heart.

The spirit of home tasting nostalgic

Makes me think sick-  

daydream haze.

but I can’t shake the feelings I’ve been

Drowning in since the day we met

I can see the sun setting in your eyes

Even if I’m stuck in the haze

   I can’t complain about my view

lessons from a dead man 

My father always told me

To wear my feelings

Lightly for boys will

Come in and they

Dance until they’re sick

They won’t know

How to teach me

The ethics to

Grow my garden

My father always told me

To wear my feelings lightly for

Boys will come in and they

Dance until they’re sick       

I need to know where the river ends

If the time we share is thrown in the ocean

Do our bones wash up on shore?

Before the next Wolf Moon, my eyes

Bleed tears of love and regret

I can’t take the sickness from the movement

Of the sea, my heart is thrown

Like an anchor,

Only to make me sink

Farther

And farther

Farther, 

down.

poem (two) 

I’m sorry I was nowhere to be found

That day in the middle of May

I stepped outside and I never made

My way back home

I needed some time

I needed some rest

The air felt so nice

It was such a delight

I couldn’t’ stop myself

I couldn’t help

But think of angels

Weeping, while we

Danced our night

Away to classical music

And red wine

Bees are productive

I don’t understand

Why shoes have

Laces if the human

Wearing the shoe

Is as lazy as a

Bee

If you took the time

To really read through

The cattail reeds

You could find the

Sun rises brighter

On the East -

Take a knife to

The right eye

Chaos chases

The men

Who don’t

Cry

Even when

The rain falls

In spring

Together

We can hear

Our gardens

Grow

I can’t stand the smell

Of the men

Who don’t read

Their books

You have eyes

You have a mind

Why don’t you read?

You’ve got all this time

I can’t stand the smell

Of the men

Who don’t read

Their books

I like it when my mom folds my socks

The way she takes the time to find

All the dots and stripes

I like when my mom folds my socks

To water the garden of hopeless love

Or

To drink from a fountain of blood

Can’t seem to find a reason for either

As long as the sun shines a red kind of

Yellow, I really don’t mind walking

The dog.

You could eat the snake skin Dad brought home for us

Or you could just mow the lawn before more dinner

The choice is yours

You could walk across the street with no eyes in your

Sockets or you could paint Mother’s house with the blood

From your pig

The choice is yours

Lines of nonsense in America

As far as the eye can see

The light in the middle of night

Awaken, a golden hue

Before midnight only the dawn can

Taste her scent. Taken in by the beauty,

Surround the evening with

Mischief and coyote blood 

for him only to lick the wounds

Never forget,

He is the one who holds your soul

Surrender your nightmares

To the Holy Sun before dawn

Take the taste of the ocean

And keep that to yourself

Lines on the road to direct

Us to our destination

For bombs to go off and guns to ignite

Bring the fight

murdering the minds

birds that can’t fly

child that is blind

soak in some time

the sidewalk bleeds

crying out for help

rain covers the leaves

that don’t fall

no one has to know

the way you show me

the moon

shouldn’t

I shouldn’t have to admit

The light from the moon

Gives me a feeling of regret

great feeling of remorse

like I killed a dead horse

nothing compares to the

air on the mountaintop

peaches tumble down the

hill, where we used to kiss

where we used to dance

before the men mowed

the lawn

before I fell from the fourth

floor

before I felt death

at

my

front

door

Back then

The despair stuck

With me

Never left me

Always in my

Pocket

But with you

I can act like

None of this

Exists

Something so

Pure

Between

The two

Of us

I can’t

Quite

Hear the

Rest of the

World

And

I

Am 

Content 

Nothing can ever live

In this space ever again

Trashed beyond

Belief

Embarrassed to say

These are all my

Thoughts… scattered

Across the hardwood floor

Embarrassed to admit

I don’t feel a goddamn thing

About this.

lilac dreams 

These feelings

…I must confess

Make me cry in the

Dead of winter

Make me shiver in the

River on a July night

Make me dance in the

Rain during a spring thunderstorm

I just want to taste the inside of

Your brain, see where you go when you

Sleep

I want to watch the love inside your indigo

Heart grow

    Beneath all things,

Deeper than

        A soul can shine

I must confess…

I will love you, until the end of time.

 sometimes when it's dead...it's dead.

Have you ever tried to love a dead plant?

It’s harder than one thinks…

The toll it takes on someone’s soul

It makes my black heart ache

Have you ever tried to love a dead plant?

The time you waste watering

An organism that has died –

Nothing can bring it back

Have you ever tried to love a dead plant ?

from this morning

you give me life maggie 

With the way things are going…

I can tell it may rain later 
And then you will waltz
Across my garden

  With no business being there
I asked for peace, you gave me 
A hurricane


I can’t stand the skin 
I see in the sea’s reflection

I can see myself 
     Buried under years
Of pretending 

I didn’t exist, 

or

My garden didn’t need water

Well that’s a lie 

I am learning that, 

The Hard Way.

fog

Can’t seem to keep

Moving forward

With love in my left

Pocket and years

That turn into

One long

Day

How is this so familiar

With a decade in between

Nothing seems to

Have changed

Everything, so familiar

The time spent

With you my dear,

Sets fire to my heart

I feel free. My soul sings

Me to sleep. I'm grateful 

You're in my dreams.

Buried beneath a place

Where we sleep

Where our dreams come true

Stuck in between two moons

   Burn the love

Just give me a break

 A cigarette

This tongue exists only for

My lies.

Don’t touch this skin, it doesn’t

Belong to you anymore

 Need to find my way out

   Had enough for my teeth

Fall out and I can’t seem to

Pick them up

Stuck in that room

this past year my dreaming tree died

      a place where i used to hide

sometimes just for a day

             other times maybe for weeks

a place where my voice was

heard even when I didn’t speak

always giving my love to the wrong one

  one who steps on my bones, 

dry and brittle

 just to break them into pieces

to make me feel the pain 

 Trapped in a light

I saw

    A flame

 Before the storm

Before our mess

Let’s push

Let’s bring it back

To the beginning

Before I choke

On the tears

That have been

Here for years

Can’t undo the

Time we’ve spent

Or the time held

Close to our hearts

cut her free

It can’t work if we don’t have time

Take my eyes, take my ears

I can still hear

I know you don’t care, I know your

Mother wouldn’t mind

Just kill me here, with the knife

That you lick at night

 

Inside my brain, living and hanging

Flies, withering away

Trying to make sense of this love

That you claim to give me

Balancing

Admire the illusion

The colors that sink further

Can’t seem to catch my breath

Digging deeper, follow me

Dig deeper

To find nothing here

Alive,

Unlike the time

Not a thing here

Is alive

To find space to breathe

To eat the sunrise

Even before the day

I can’t touch the ceiling

I can’t see the walls

Together a square forms

And I’m there

On the floor

Bleeding

I may die

I am dead

crying

Second cut love 

 I like myself when i'm alone and free

When I can hear nothing but a bee

Just still, beautiful yet wild

So fast, but not even moving

I like myself when I’m alone and free

When I can see the moon on a sunny

Day and the stars fill my mind with

Dreams. I like myself when i'm alone

And free

QUEEN OF CROWS

(depends on the day)

eating the moonlight

a feeling of…

eternal love

   maybe love?

Can’t describe the mess

  Unfading, fading BUT

so BRIGHT

Everlasting lust

Enduring the future

With thorns sticking

Out my side

Wings spread across

   The sky

Ready to fly

Being a Queen:

   Queen of Crows,

Stars kiss me when

No one else can hold

Me

Loving me is loving

The Black: 

no time

No destination

No shapes

   Just black

So before you pull

Out your sword,

The Queen of Crows

ALWAYS asks,

   Consider the time before we shared the

Midnight sky, did you even know

I was there ?

Why do you have such a beautiful bird?

why do you have such a beautiful bird

If you don’t let her live

Her life consists of metal bars and food

    Maybe some sunlight if she asks for it

           (a beautiful bird shouldn’t have to ask for the light, it should be given to her as a gift. As for she is a gift from another world that we should cherish and hold gently)

Such radiant colors

   Beautiful set of wings

 Why do you have a bird if you

Just keep her in her cage?

Don’t be greedy, don’t be mean

   Let her out for the world to see

She has a purpose, she serves as a symbol

Let her magnificent soul rise

     And fly

Free.

    (like a bird should be)

Why do you have such a beautiful bird?

why do you have such a beautiful bird

If you don’t let her live

Her life consists of metal bars and food

    Maybe some sunlight if she asks for it

           (a beautiful bird shouldn’t have to ask for the light, it should be given to her as a gift. As for she is a gift from another world that we should cherish and hold gently)

Such radiant colors

   Beautiful set of wings

 Why do you have a bird if you

Just keep her in her cage?

Don’t be greedy, don’t be mean

   Let her out for the world to see

She has a purpose, she serves as a symbol

Let her magnificent soul rise

     And fly

Free.

    (like a bird should be)

A night away

Write our names in the midnight sky

     Passing by, laughing and smiling

Melting but still cold

  Dance around the planets with me

Wrap my body in that white dress

   And let my hair touch the floor

Funerals are for people who

    Don’t have real friends, so before

We let the procession begin,  

      Pick some flowers from Saturn

and I will water our minds for our

time has to end. 

    In this life, 

     I have come to find out

That all good things die and

Time is all we share.    So let’s dance

Until our feet bleed and our hearts

Make  

        Love.

   

carry on.

Taking time to realize

   The sheep don’t fall

Far from their castles

   Nor do their prey-

Nothing seems array

  When money is easy

To find because the

Backyard tree was gifted

From your Father-

But when you grow up

    In an abode full of stress

And mess: money-less

Things seems real and raw

   At such a young age

Love seemed to be the only

       way-

I don’t ask for you to

Shower me in gifts or money

    All I want is to dance around

The moon, with you in hand-

Sometimes the apples taste

Like the pears, and you want

To be that sweet too.

But honey,

      melons

Don’t grow when the sun

Can’t shine, and the love

In my mind has evaporated

Into a haze-

I just feel for the people

Who think money is

The answer to love.

Because it’s certainly not

Heading to the sea (home).

 I need time for me

I’ve lost all my memories

But I can see them rolling

Into the ocean’s mind

Back and forth

Back and forth

Taking the time to travel

I must make my way back

To the sea

    Under the 

Moonlit beach

Our dreams come true

Only to make me think

 It is such a shame

Many men, many women

  Anyone, anything

Seem to fall

Head over their two feet

For me

I don’t understand it

  what do they see in me?

So many scars 

   Cover my human skin

With a crooked mouth

And a head full of

  love lies.
it's such a sin
for them to waste 

their time on this (me)