Can’t say I miss the

Way you licked my

    Scars

Can’t say I miss

The way you

Pulled my hair

With the beast

Inside

Ready to yell

I don’t think you

Truly got a taste

Can’t say I miss

Your love

For I was dead

For centuries

When you were

Around and I

Did nothing

To you man

But give my love

Can’t say I

miss you

anymore

 An unparalleled confession

  Down on my knees

  Begging and yelling

PLEASE

PLEASE

please

Settle down to taste the sun

As I melt into the background

Nothing to hold me anymore

Nothing to take hold of

   An unparalleled feeling

I laugh as they lay my body

To rest and he is there

Standing over me

As beautiful as the city sidewalk

                              Covered in rain

Love hides around every corner

I have never felt 

so empty in my

goddamn life

I have swallowed 

the seas I have licked

The full moon

Take these hands

and let me feel what’s

Real, I can’t 

take it anymore

living in the shadows 

for 

most of this life

i am ready for 

something

new 

Fast As You Can - Fiona Apple - 10/28/2017

Find us at the bottom

Where we find comfort

In the dark corners

  Crawl up the walls

To come back down

   a place we call home

no competition 
love is love 
and nothing 
compares to his
or hers
i can't quite
place a finger
on it 
   all i know is
love is love
and the way
he loved me 
can't compare 
to the love we 
share
we hold in the
dawn's rain

this love isn't
like anything 
i've ever felt
   touched 
kissed .....

love is love
but don't make
me compare 

it doesn't matter if the sun is round
it can't matter when the cows are
milked, the farm is under
construction- DON'T COME IN

poem

In a weird way

I fall in love

With every

   Man

With every

   W o m a n

I lay eyes on

Licking my lips

Thinking about

Their taste

This light

Won’t go out

As long as

I have 

these  eyes

Knocking down the

Pile of skulls

   Rattle the dead bones

The bones, the color

Of bones,

The color of her eyes

Nothing feels closer

       Than the

Ghost in this

    Room when

I stand in between

Peeling this skin

   Back

Layer by layer

Bones and all

EXPOSED

Touching what

Feels real

When everything

That exists 

      is fake

one lonely flower

shining, standing tall
but no one to share this
beauty with

every morning, the sunrise
every night, the sunset

no one to watch with
no one to love with

one lonely flower
shining, standing tall

but no one to share this
beautiful life with 

I want to scream

I want to scream

I want to scream

..... 

Ripping down our walls

Taking the dog out

While you turn sour and sore

Killing me with your

Mean words and the sins

Afraid of not being your

Friend, when you wanted

To throw this heart to

The moon, I still held on

Silly me, silly me, silly me

Grab the knife and just kill

Me

Why don’t you

burn

Open up her soul

Start the fire

     When she howls

     When she HOWLS

Watch it burn

Her body, exposed

Love lived here

  Years ago

Now a fire burning

Destroying her walls

As he stands and watches 

It burns, it burns, it burns

Nothing left to show

as my osseous
heart
     slowly sinks
to oblivion
seventy nuns
take my dreams
  and hoard them
letting them rot
       and smell
as June Bugs
create a Hell
an inlet
for all North American
Bugs
 a Pail full of tears, i've been
carrying around
for fucking years-
it's time to
let the summer soak
and the mosquitoes
    moan
as i gaze three
alligators
make way

i wish i was dead

i'd have more friends.

      Graceful with her words

 But nothing to follow

As I fall down, I need her to

Lift me but nothing around

    Just silence and holes

    In my soul

    

killing time 

Ominous streets

    Change your name

 For a nickel

 nothing wrong

       With that, such a beautiful

       Waste. Dark and grim

       With thorns sticking out

      don't mess with the 

elegant stress of life and death

(poem)

Feeling (almost) naked

With thoughts and

      Bones (bare)

Glued to the wall

   The same wall

Where (sheepskin) hangs

Hang my head on the

Shelf (with) books

                       And things

               

CLOVES - Better Now - 7/26/2018 - Paste Studios - New York, NY

z

Even with my empty mind

 He knows what’s right,

His brown eyes

    Making love to  my

Thoughts, playing music

      For my bleak mind 

He knows how to keep

This dead soul alive

And I love him all the

Way through my toes

fireless fire

Neutral eyes

    Our minds

Intertwined

Orange red

    Exposed in the

Summer’s Wind

    A desolate place

To make love

 Lunar stars in a treeless

World

Hold my heart because

It feels empty

  Lately

Wipe the blush off your cheeks

  Your lips, a porcelain grey

   Hiding your tongue behind

Dancing teeth will only get you

Numb man

Her coral colored eyes

  Speaking the truth

Which makes January cold

   The color of snow,

Obsolete roads leading

The endless

         Scarlet heat

pain relief

I can’t help

But shake when I hear

His voice

     Something holding me

High, like hooks in my back

A shelf for all the books

When he breathes my

          Heart stops

And the blood rushes out

          My teeth

warm water 

Silence kills the ones

                 Who think

Deep - 

     D e e p e r        than

A hole in the cemetery

     Floor

     She takes her

        Secrets and 

buries them 

before the show every

W  E D N E S D A Y 

     

poem

The way she moves

   Like a sea with no salt

A flower with no petals

sharp knives

Running off a mountain

     Just to feel the wind

          In between these

                 Arms

A place where you

Used to hide

Now an empty ocean

No one knows where to

Lie anymore

       I used to take the words

       I used to take the pain

But finally my eyes

Shattered

And I couldn’t find

              My breath

With a needle to my

              Head

A gun to the ground

    Hold my heart up

             And set fire

        To the holes in

My head

SaberTooth 

All my teeth

    Are falling out my head

    Words don’t mean a thing

When the lights can’t dance

Or the music doesn’t play

It’s not polite you make my

Teeth itch after midnight 

When the moon reflects the 

future and the sky eats 

    my eyes.

Japanese Jazz 

don't waste your 
time with a dead bee

all it will bring you 

is misery

and lost love

the same place

i found my heart

seven years ago

today

with blood pouring out

   fear only the 

time taken from 

you 

midnight sky

and ruby eyes

shimmer in 

the light

of a crescent moon

as i take my last

breath 

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John Butler Trio "Spring to Come" Acoustic In-Studio

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    i walk bare footed
into September 
to forget about this 
HELL you've created

   i thought love really
mattered to you
i thought the skin 
on your arms was the
       skin 
that covers me

    late at night when
no one else wants to

took time, 
   took years 
(almost ten)
    to realize my love
is worth more than 
the effort you 
did not put in

eyes full of tears

   because i am finally free
i am finally happy

i am back to me 

free like the sea
with you by my side

the sound of the 
Moon 

       climbing through 
       our sky 

beating down on 
the two of us

take my hand 
if you see my soul 

laughing teeth showing
as the birds cry as the 
children dance
    
    we have to remind ourselves

together we are home 
      time doesn't survive  here

late to our own love
    but i couldn't be 
                happier

   

thief of the sun
everything we are
everything we were

taking a toll on this
soul 

reason with the night
to find yourself
drowning in the River

before this 
there was  nothing

when you knock 
they can't hear

fabric of this 
soul moving with 
the forest's wind

standing with a 
heart in hand

  weave through
time to find 

reality 
even in the dark 

  ...weekend vibes

learning how planets love

the stars

i make my way to Jupiter

    just to find my heart 

again

growing in the heat

growing in the heat

    

   lay my feet down strong

for roots to grow 

lay me down 

stronger than the Moon

on Earth

a sight no one has seen

   the color of Pluto

the sea that washes 

 away the demons

  when the rings of 

Saturn bring me 

home

    i know 

i will be with you

again 

where this soul 

             should be 

the smell of pine
 that drips 
from the forest floor
that brings us 
together

surrender the  fear
of the    sunlight

let the river water
bring you home
feel the dark wind

on your skin
as   
   
    the shadows
of trees 

dance into the
night 

i said

  i must confess
   i must confess
    i must confess

.....
the blood that drips
from this wound

   copper

tastes like the
sun on a bad day
mixed with 
   the fire 
that burned 
    your house 


i cannot take 
the noise 
inside my brain

you see when 
rain pours down
on me 
all i can hear
is
the 
  white
     noise

Miley Cyrus - Midnight Sky (Official Video)

MY FUCKING QUEEN

poem

i would go to the red barn 
   just before dawn
to throw out
my anger and let the 
  breeze take 
     my eyes
linger
down


d
 o
  w
    n

to the sky my mouth touches, licks
as the dark and coppery clouds roll by
in and o u t 

           in and
o u t  

Fiona Apple - Fetch The Bolt Cutters (Official Audio)

take the taste of my soul
  boil it with the sound of
the Moon and here 
is your creature of
.
.
.
the
night

realizing 
love 
left when day
turned to night
    when the stars fell
from the black 
sky
only to set fire 
to our 
seas

Fiona Apple - Newspaper (Official Audio)

bleeding out red blood
scatter this body over
the morning sunrise

blood drips from 
  the 
        blazing amber sun

with bugs in my 
      eyes and feelings 
on the floor 
i cannot tell who is 
human anymore

devour her grace 
touch   her elegance

saturated in bare fate
diluting the taste 
               with a rose
                        aroma

harvest her mute heart and 
     touch her plump lips

the perforated shore
   eats at our toes again
   while we watch 
the tart 
   sun 
   set

composer of a vibrant 
  summer 
collect her
fate  and melancholy
smile
shiver every time
she walks by

what the human loves
   bare and desolate

harvest her transparent
    heart before 
    morning wakes

leather chest lover
screaming to the Saints
streets       covered in
December's      snow 

Fiona Apple - Not About Love (Official Video)

take this body 

soul and all

     poke my brain 

     with a feather

     to help erase

memories 

that pour out 

uncontrollably 

 

flowers fall

the moon is full of love and i'm scared again

nothing but the ceiling 

    moves

her voice shines in the

       moonlight 

shake my bones
let my teeth 
      dangle 
touching the ocean floor
life seems OK      from
   t his          angle

 

 

nimble angels of the black
night come to dance
with me to the moon
coyotes haggard fangs show
sucking all the roses dry
  all the white roses
child of the winter
wrap your arms around her
tight
holding on to the only
thing that matters
that makes sense on this
midnight ship
  the creamy amber moon
rises as the
    ship drops anchor
men hold up the stars
         which fill
        the sky oh so bright
a nice shade of gold 
and as she looks at me
her eyes glisten with
such
      might 

men of the spring war
home
sing sweet suicides
to their wives and
children to be
only for a moment
    the blood from
your mother
found smeared across the Red
      Sea
screaming sweet lullabies to the night
watching Queens drown their goats and
throwing their prayers in the River by the
     House

a dollar doesn't mean a damn thing
if you ain't ready for
anything
        he said

she asks of him
to bury her fingers
in the library
  a place where
she loved to be
  asks of him to take
her tongue out to sea
for the salt in the air lifted her spirits
  she asked of him once
       if she passed
to bury her mouth in the
woods for she loved
the taste
 asked him to throw her soul
in the garden where
the brown sunflowers grow
  before she left this
world all she wanted of
       him was to bury her heart
in the mortuary
away from the graphite minds
  whom consumed her
whole in the real world

it's really hard to find
June Bugs in the middle
of Spring only because
the man hasn't cried
yet
hasn't shed his winter's
coat
webs from the May spiders
connect our minds
for ideas to lightly walk
across while Mondays
bring dinner flowers
with a back pocket
full of lies and missed
birthdays- let us set
this house on fire
for these memories don't
deserve a home
anymore

Joni Mitchell ~ Big Yellow Taxi + Both Sides Now (BBC - 1969)

from this morning's walk 

sitting in the middle

of this river 

the water 

  glides over my calves 

as i see my reflection 

make her way down stream

changing shapes 

    and

colors 

the refraction through

   tree limbs, leaves

    form and realities 

the water 

can tell the you 

the truth 

if you believe

in her

collecting rocks from 

the stream 

to tell stories 

 to my children 

when i make my 

             way back home