please poem.

please keep your shoes on when you come in
please hit your father in the head
please lock me out of your abode
please throw my dinner on the line
please burn the mailbox in September
please mow the lawn after midnight
please slam the doors upside down
please buy me blood diamonds on Christmas
please write my name in the rice
please skip to the beat with a parakeet
please hold the door for the next four whores
please order Chinese food on halloween
please dip your coffee in my toast
please run me over the day after tomorrow.